Show Notes
Bless your morn with this pod as we discuss why it's important when to take control of a situation and when you're losing it
Scripture referenced:
View Full Transcript
Episode Transcript
[00:00:00] Welcome to the Life Refresh podcast. My name is Ryan Robinson and if you are looking for a podcast that is designed to uplift, encourage, and revive your heart, mind and spirit, you're in the right place. Welcome to the journey of becoming the version of you God designed from the foundations of the earth. Hello and welcome back to Life Refresh podcast. You know who it is. It's Ryan Robinson. I'm a little under the weather allergy season is kicking my butt, y'all. It's kicking my legs. So if you hear some sniffling, it is what it is.
[00:00:41] But I want to really just jump right in. We have been in this amazing series and actually this series is going to be something that will be especially as we're coming up on holiday season.
[00:00:54] There's a lot of things that happen. Obviously. Black sail. Fridays are on ten. They will be on Ten, I should say probably in the next week or two. We have other things coming about as we're entering into this season. Family comes around. But one of the things that I've learned and many of us have experienced is the challenges that the holidays bring.
[00:01:19] There's family that you may have not seen all year. There's people that typically act a little bit different because the holiday season is here. But I want to really speak on the subject and if I call this series, it's going to be called Control Alt Delete.
[00:01:41] Control alt delete that's for the PC people.
[00:01:48] If you're a Mac if you're a Mac it is command alt delete.
[00:01:56] But both are synonymous, right? They both have important functions when it works on a computer. But in relationships, have you even considered that those three commands can either break or make relationships during this time, especially when there's pressure applied? I don't think so. So we're going to just jump right into it. And first of all, if you haven't shared this with anyone, please share it with a friend, a family member, whoever that you may think will get some value from it. And what I'll do, especially as we're going through this particular season, there is going to be some scriptural references that are going to be made during this time. So I really want to make sure that they'll be in the show notes, but use those as guides to refer back to and again, listening to the podcast will provide some context for you as we go through. Okay, so we're going to jump right into it, but we're going to start with Control, control or Command.
[00:03:01] And let me give you the origin story, first of all on some of these things. So Control is a key on the keyboard that is used to command an operating system to do something specific. It's directing or altering a standard operational function. So consider this when you are on the computer and it's crazy that these things are actually called hotkeys.
[00:03:29] I'm going to say that again, these are called hotkeys. So instead of using a cursor, you use the keyboard since your hands are already there in a specific combination, that will create a certain result. So if you hit CTRL C or Command C, it does copy. If you did Control V or Command V, it will paste whatever you copy. Okay, so that's just like the simplest one that I can do at this point. There's several combinations, but those combinations create certain outcomes for you on a particular device. So how much so would this actually be meaningful to you when you're in a relationship, family member, whatever the case is? Now, if we really want to get to it, if we just went right off the name of Command and Control, those by themselves have negative sometimes they have negative connotations, depending on who you are. Right. Control sounds in some cases, it's a positive thing to make sure that you have all of your circumstances altogether, that there aren't any I's not dotted and T's not crossed, that you have everything in place. And if you're a PC, command sounds great. It is something that you dictate and tell what needs to be done. Just looking at the words and verbs which they are themselves make sense. They make sense, but do they make sense in the context of a relationship? So with command and control being the words that we're going to use for today, I like to really discuss really how those can contribute to a healthy relationship or lead to a disastrous relationship.
[00:05:23] Okay, so I'm going to go to some scripture here, so give me one moment here. But we're going to be coming from, again, the book of Genesis. It is one of my favorite books simply because it's the book of the beginning. And depending on if you are a hermeneutical person who loves reading the word and the things that they talk about or things that it talks about the law first mentioned is what we refer to is whenever something happens first. And I've said this before in some previous podcasts, but if you haven't heard this verb or this phrase said first, you want to. Go to where it was first mentioned, and it will give you an indication and an understanding as to why this word is the way it is. So if we go to Genesis, chapter two, and we're going to go right into let's see. So let's do this. We're going to go to Genesis, chapter two, verse 18. So we're going to go to that first and I'm going to read for you and then we're going to talk about it. Okay?
[00:06:31] And then the Lord said it is not good for man to be alone. I'm a pause right there. This was the only thing that God said wasn't good.
[00:06:40] That man should be alone when he was creating everything was good or very good. This right here, the only thing that he said was not good. So then God said, it is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper who is just right for him. So the Lord God formed from the ground all the wild animals and all the birds of the sky. He brought them to the man to see what he would call them. Remember this piece? And the man chose a name for each one. He gave names to all the livestock. All the birds of the sky and all the wild animals. But still, there was no helper. Just right for him. So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep. While the man slept, the Lord took out one of the man's ribs and closed up the opening. Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib and he brought her to the man. At last the man exclaimed, this is bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh. She will be called Woman because she was taken from man.
[00:07:51] This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife and the two are united into one.
[00:07:59] Now, the man and his wife were both naked and they felt no shame. So we're going to just jump right into this. Because the control part is control and command are displayed actually in this piece here. Now, the thing is, what we found is that when Adam is naming, he's been given the responsibility, he has been given dominion to take over and manage what is in the Garden of Eden. And what is being said here is right after God said it's not good for him to be alone. He is given the responsibility to name everything that God created.
[00:08:36] Okay? So he gave the lion the title of lion, so on and so forth. If you believe what the word of God says. So with that being the case, God said still, even though he has the authority and the ability to command a name, to control a circumstance and control really what this individual or animal is named and what that name? Means and all the things that go along with that. He said it still wasn't good because there wasn't a helper that was suitable for him.
[00:09:12] Adam is talking to birds, bees, animals, creepy crawly things, and none of them were as effective as a helper for him. Nothing was good enough for Adam. Okay, so there's a time and a place to have command and control. And the thing is, you need to operate in which the things that God has given you control over you take control over.
[00:09:42] There are circumstances, there are situations, whether it be your yard, it may be your home. It's the things that God has entrusted you with because he's given you this gift called dominion, which means to domain, to reign in. And with that the responsibility of controlling those circumstances and situations. You have grass.
[00:10:06] I Think If you have a house, you probably have a yard. If you do, and if you have a yard, there's a responsibility to cut that grass. If you cut the grass or don't cut the grass, guess what? That's on you. Because it's what? It's your dominion. Unless you pay somebody else or pay your neighbor to come over and cut it. Either way, the neighbor is not coming across my yard and cutting my grass without me telling them that it's okay to do it. Why? Because on that property line, that boundary says your grass is your grass and my grass is my grass. Unless I given you the ability and the authority to come over and do what I ask you to do.
[00:10:48] That is Adam's responsibility to be able to name, keep and maintain the garden.
[00:10:59] But it's so much that he can't do it by himself. It's the only thing God said wasn't good, that this guy, this man Adam, who was made in the image and likeness of God, didn't have someone that he could share this with. So what God does is he puts Adam in a deep sleep. That's for a marriage counseling service. He puts Adam into a deep sleep. Long story.
[00:11:27] But what he does is he puts him in a deep sleep and instead and what he does, God does is he pulls his partner right from his rib.
[00:11:40] Okay? Now, these are the details that we always need to be cognizant of. Why did God, out of all the bones in the body, why did he pick the rib?
[00:11:56] Well, the thing is, the rib, no matter how tall you are or no matter how short you are, is in a middle section of your body.
[00:12:09] So he made Adam to be equal to him, but function differently. I'm going to say that again. He made Adam he made Eve to be equal to, but different than him. Okay, so what does that mean? He had the function of man.
[00:12:36] She came from what he's made out of, but was fashioned differently than him. So what we typically forget and why God didn't pick a kneecap to make Eve. He didn't take a shoulder bone to make him a head. No, he took something that actually functions to cover the most internal, most exclusive and honestly, the most meaningful organs in the body for survival.
[00:13:14] He pulled from that place to create Eve, to create a woman.
[00:13:21] Okay, now, I'm saying all this to say there has to be a function in a manner of mutual surrender and mutual service to each other.
[00:13:34] Yeah. Adam has the responsibility to name stuff. That's cool.
[00:13:39] So does Eve. She has that opportunity to do that as well. But they do it what? In concert together.
[00:13:45] Because at the end of this chapter, it says, the two shall become one. Which I don't know what that math makes to you, but when I see one and one, that equals two. But when two become one. That looks different to me and it looks different because Eve came from Adam. So when Eve connects with Adam, adam is now complete.
[00:14:08] And we're not talking Jerry Maguire complete. We are talking about there is a oneness that comes spiritually because there is a mutual love, care, respect that comes from being connected in marriage, okay?
[00:14:30] And in relationship, period. I just want to make sure we're clear on that because we forget that we have a partner and I'm guilty. I'm guilty myself of realizing and understanding that I'm not by myself in a relationship, particularly one that I'm in for life.
[00:14:56] There is a mutual respect and partnership that has to be had because I am looking at myself, outside myself. This says the word, says that the two shall become one. So if I believe what God says about that, the person that I connect with spiritually that I am married to is able to see the blemish on my face that I can only see in the mirror. But because we are one, they can tell me what they see and I need to be able to receive that. Why? Because we are in this thing called a marriage, a covenant.
[00:15:35] Now, that may be tough for us to see. And I'm going to tell you, this is why the control and the command keeps in. Because I don't like necessarily saying I got something on my face, I got a booger coming out my nose. Sorry to be graphic, I have sleep in my eye. I don't want someone on the other side to tell me that. So what ends up happening is I get the hotkey. They press a hotkey on me and because I get upset, I start saying, hey, don't put me out there like that.
[00:16:05] Hey, listen, that was the wrong time to say that, but you had something in your eye. I wanted to make sure you did. Thank you. But there was a better time you could do it. Now you start making up excuses why? Because you want to control the circumstances and situations by which you are being coddled in, that you are being helped in so that it doesn't look so bad on you. There's someone who wants to control circumstances because they feel safe, because they control all the cards. So they can basically manipulate situations to make them seem as if they're what they are, but they're really not what they are. Let me repeat that again. They want to control circumstances so that it looks better than what it really is.
[00:16:58] So as long as I keep this away, I can control the narrative. I can command where I get insight, I can command where I get the applause. As long as I look good, it doesn't have to be good, but as long as I look good doing it, I got the command in the situation.
[00:17:19] It is a very difficult thing for us because honestly, we can't control anything.
[00:17:25] The only thing they say you can control and it's the truth, is you can only control the things that are around you, right? I can control my attitude. I can control those circumstances, pretty much. I can't control whether I wake up tomorrow morning. I can't control whether or not I get the best amount of rest. I can do everything I can. But there are circumstances that come up that I didn't expect. Like I have a one year old son. If my one year old son wakes up in the middle of the night and I'm somewhat awake, I didn't plan for that. I literally didn't plan for that. That's unexpected interruption of sleep, I can't command that. I can't control that. And to tell a one year old that you need to go to bed, like he understands me, doesn't happen, right?
[00:18:25] So those situations and circumstances are important to talk about.
[00:18:33] And I want to bring up one more thing.
[00:18:38] It is necessary for us to have a balance in relationships.
[00:18:45] Balance.
[00:18:47] We have to have balance. There's things that I don't know. There's things that my wife knows that I don't know. And this is where God says the two shall become one.
[00:18:59] The best example I can give and I'm going to close with this.
[00:19:03] Relationships are like a three legged race.
[00:19:09] If you've ever done a three leg, I don't know if the people do that anymore, but if they do, this is what happens.
[00:19:16] You are tied one leg to the other and you now have to coordinate yourself toward a particular goal and output to win the race. Okay?
[00:19:31] It sucks learning because some people are shorter while they're partnered with a taller person. But they have to figure out how to get a rhythm by which works best for everyone so that the short person don't get thrown off and then the tall person doesn't drag the other person right there. It is a three legged race that happens when you're in relationship with someone. So you are learning all the time how to coordinate with someone.
[00:20:06] And there has to be a balance in command, a balance in control.
[00:20:15] And it has to be mutually advantageous to everyone because if it tilts one way, you're going to have an upset partner, you have difficulty and you'll start hitting those hotkeys again.
[00:20:32] Maybe I'll name the series Hotkeys because if you hit these and you hit them altogether, it will terminate and will functionally restart anything that you had running and can easily interrupt good things that are happening in your life. Okay, so we're going to close this podcast for today. Again, share with somebody, let somebody know. We'll see you in the next podcast. Peace.
