Show Notes
Change is painful, it’s hard and we typically hate it. In this pod we’ll talk about why it’s so painful and how we can learn to thrive in it and improve our perception of it.
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Episode Transcript
[00:00:00] Speaker A: You may be going through a change right now. And if you are looking for keys on how to successfully change and transition to your next season, you're gonna find it here in this next pod. Keep it locked.
Hey, everyone, this is Ryan. Welcome to shifts and ladders. I'm excited to talk with you today, particularly on this topic that everyone goes through. It is the topic of change we are going through and are going through a massive amount of change. Whether you are growing up naturally and changing your numbers, changing your body is responding differently. If you're transitioning from a different relationship or you're transitioning careers, everyone goes through this process of change. Now. The part that most people they do differently is how successfully they go through change depicts on how they are catapulted in their next season of life. We all transition, whether it be spiritually, emotionally, relationally, mentally, physically, all of these areas. We all have some kind of change that takes place within us. And generally change is happening in one of two places, is happening in us, is happening around us, and it is also happening just by. Just by osmosis, just by being this existing.
And depending on what place you're in, there's more speed to that. There's more speed to change in many circumstances. So you might be in an environment that you don't want to be in naturally with it comes to work, or you might not be fulfilled in a relationship. And there's a level of urgency because you don't want to spend the one life you have miserable. Right. So change is always going to be taking place. But how we change is actually the most important thing. And we're going to kind of get into it. But as we're going through all of this, let me ask you the question, and I know you asked this question. I do, too. But why is change so hard?
We know we have to do it, but we avoid it as much as we can. And I would say there's three reasons why change is so hard. One is because we're emotional beings.
It's just human nature to not be comfortable with the unknown.
In fact, we are more comfortable with what we perceive the past to be. And this is the key. What we perceive the past to be versus what is going to be happening in the future.
We typically hold on to those good moments. And the thing is, as much as you think it was good, then it might not be as good as you think it was. And this is a key piece here.
Our present moment and our interpretation of our past is informed by our present moment.
[00:03:43] Speaker B: Okay?
[00:03:43] Speaker A: So if we're having a painful moment today.
We look back and say, oh, man, it was such a much better time then.
That may not always be true. It's because we have a different perspective now than we did then. But if we went back then, it might not have been the best season. You're probably saying it was your worst season, but then you look back again and say, oh, man, it was so much better when I was in my twenties. It may not have been. It's just because we're in a painful circumstance now that we don't have the foresight to look into the future. We only go back with what we think we know happened. We might be missing out on some really important details that we.
That we may not want to revisit, but we typically gloss over that. Why? Because we don't want to have to deal with the emotion transitioning and changing into what the future has in for us. Number two, the other reason why change is so hard is that our bodies, our human brain wants to change. Or, sorry, our human brain does not want to create new habits.
I spoke about this book, atomic habits, most, you know, quite a bit, but there is a piece in it that atomic habits, saying, break down to the most atomic level, a new pattern, a new thing. And in doing so, you actually alleviate the emotional stress that comes with changing. There's also a physically mental toll when it comes to changing. Your body actually utilizes more calories when you have to do something different, particularly when it's something that you're not used to. So, you know, when you're in class and you're learning new stuff and you get a headache, or maybe I'm just talking about me. When I was learning something, he was like, oh, my God, it's a lot of information, and your brain is, like, hurting. And it's because your brain is learning and building new connections and building new, uh, opportunities and burning calories, getting yourself to understand and. And learn these new concepts, on top of making sure your heart's beating, making sure your digestive system is doing what it needs to do, making sure you use the facilities at the right time, like, all kinds of stuff the brain is in charge of. So there's a lot of things going on in the background that your brain is honestly functioning through. And on top of that is trying to allow you to learn new information and bring that in, synthesize it, apply it, and then be able to display competency in the form of a test.
But isn't it crazy how the human brain has been designed, how the human body. Just not forget the brain. Well, not forget the brain. The brain and the body. The whole package itself is just crazily and amazingly designed. God really made an amazing machine. He made us. But this is the piece about habits that we have to get to. Habits are actually designed to help our bodies or our minds to not deal with menial tasks repetitively and be able to apply those resources to other things, which is called, like, muscle memory. When you're doing or you're driving, this has happened to me, so it might have happened to you at some point, but if I'm just going to tell on myself. Sometimes you get in the car and you're thinking, and then you're driving home, whether it's been from the grocery store, you're going home from work and you know the route and you're thinking, you're thinking, or you might be jamming out to your favorite song. Whatever the case is, you're aware of stuff, or you seems like you're aware, but you're kind of not as present as you could be, right? And then you pop up at your house like, oh, shoot, how in the world did I get here? Well, it's because I've driven the same route day in, day out. You just understand why, because you've done enough reps and now your mind is able to do it without you having to consciously manage it, which is incredible. You know, football players, athletes develop and practice these kind of muscle memory things so that when they're in a state of competition, they can focus more on the plays and the things that are at hand, instead of the fundamentals of standing, using your hands, all that kind of stuff. So the more reps they get, the more natural their body is able to respond to certain things. But it's usually hard. It's uncomfortable at first because it's new. It's new when you have to learn something. It's painful when you have to learn a new skill. It just. You don't feel like you know what's going on. And actually, ladies and gentlemen, that is the best place to be. Because most of the time we are always focusing on why when we were good at something, instead of focus on how we're going to be good and how we're going to excel in what the next thing is. There's this book called be the Future you now.
Be your future you now, excuse me, by doctor Benjamin Hardy. And the premise of this book is most people focus and say that their past informs their present. So the things that they have done in the past actually have gotten them here.
[00:09:18] Speaker B: Okay.
[00:09:19] Speaker A: Which is a partially true.
[00:09:21] Speaker B: Okay.
[00:09:22] Speaker A: But what really is the case for what? For being your future person, is that your vision for a future version of you actually informs your present. And let me explain this. Say that you want to lose. I'm 214 some odd pounds right now, okay? If I want to get to 200 pounds, I need to lose 14 pounds. Right?
Basic math. But there are things that people who are 200 pounds and doing the kind of things that I'm doing, what kind of lifestyle do they live so well? First of all, they go to sleep and get 8 hours of sleep, which I don't do yet.
They honestly eat a great protein. I'm pretty good at eating well right now. Also, on top of that, they work out at pretty regular.
Pretty consistent. I'm pretty consistent in doing that. They drink a lot of water. I don't drink enough water right now. So there's a whole list of habits that the future version of me is going to have to exhibit in order to become a 200 pound version of myself.
[00:10:33] Speaker B: Okay.
[00:10:34] Speaker A: You can say the same thing for being financially stable and astute. What do financially viable version. What's the financially viable, stable, and wealthy version of you do? They budget. They learn about the stock market. They invest, they build a business. They do, you know, continue on. Right. They learn how to sell. They learn different skills. So if you want to become that person, you have to build that acumen and the ability now to become that win. So it is taking these steps to become the person that you want to be. And if you don't take the steps to do that, you will actually be looking at change as a negative thing instead of looking at change as an opportunity to become better.
[00:11:25] Speaker B: Okay.
[00:11:26] Speaker A: If you don't see yourself becoming better, you will always resort back to change that is keeping you from being who you are now instead of propelling you to who you are going to become. You hear what I'm saying? Okay. Now, those are some principles as to why change is so hard. But let me help you understand and unlock this particular area of opportunity that change does. And it's really hidden around this particular principle found in physics. And I'm a quote it here. Every principle of physics is a microcosm of another meaning. For something to be true somewhere, it must also be true everywhere.
I'm gonna say it again. Every principle of physics is a microcosm of another meaning. If something is true somewhere, it must be true everywhere. Okay? So I'll give you an example, and then we'll kind of dig into this in the next podcast a bit, because I think these are patterns by which, if we understand how change leaves breadcrumbs, we can actually utilize it to navigate when we are going through changes, what emotions and things that we're going to begin to exhibit, and then navigate through it, at least be able to name it and know where we are. Because most people go through change going into the unknown like Elsa and hoping we come out instead of knowing that we're going to come through. Okay, so what does this mean? So let's use a principle that we have. Let's utilize gravity, okay?
Gravity says what goes up must come down.
[00:13:17] Speaker B: Okay.
[00:13:19] Speaker A: If we look at seasons of your favorite football team, we'll use the.
I was gonna use the Bengals. I'll use the Bengals.
There's been seasons where they've been up, there's been season that they've been down for a long time, and now they're on the up and up, right? Stock markets go up and down, up and down. And overall it's going to happen. It may not always be equal, but there will be an up and a down. Right? So no matter what's going on, whether you're doing the stock market, whether it's your favorite football team, whether it is your relationships, they go up and down, right? So this principle of gravity has a further reach than just something falling from the sky and falling at a rate that, and falling at a rate that you can measure.
No, like it works in other places. But you have to see the patterns. You have to see the patterns. And if you don't see the patterns and change, you will find yourself getting, you won't be able to anticipate. You'll find yourself being caught off guard and not prepared for it because you're not willing to see the connective tissue and foresight of change coming. So I'm excited to share with you in the next podcast this particular concept of the principles of change.
And once you learn these principles, I guarantee you will be able to navigate yourself through particular areas and also be able to say, hey, I'm going through a tough season downs, but I know that I will come up up.
Let me say that again.
I'm going through a tough season down, but I will be getting better up, just like the principle of gravity.
[00:15:25] Speaker B: Okay?
[00:15:26] Speaker A: So if you can, if you will like this pod like this on YouTube, share it and subscribe, I guarantee you will not be disappointed in the content that comes through on this podcast. All right, like I said, share it with your friend. And we'll catch you in the next podcast. Peace.
